Forty Mistakes Men Make Having Sex With A Woman

A free article on Sexuality

By: Roberto Bell

If you thought the path to sexual bliss was straightforward, look at this list of sexual blunders made by men when they're enjoying sex. If any of them seem familiar, you need to sharpen up on your bedroom etiquette!

1) Going straight for her vulva, clitoris or breasts

A woman is probably going to be irritated than sexually aroused when a man heads for her breasts and vulva after a few minutes' kissing. Be aware of what she needs and touch her sexual parts only when she's sexually aroused. If you go for her breasts when you get her into bed and twiddle her nipples like you're tuning a radio receiver, you're not going to get the right signals.

2) Not knowing how to kiss romantically

Passionate kissing is an art form which eases you both into the main event of sex and promotes intimacy. Learn how to kiss your partner, and do it well. That doesn't include sticking your tongue in her mouth and wiggling it around madly.

3) Being too rough when you touch her erogenous zones

Men like to have a strong touch applied to their penis. But if you approach her clitoris with as much force as you apply to your penis when you're treating Mr. Happy to a quick morning massage, she's likely to howl with pain - and kick you out of bed. The clitoris has 8,000 nerve endings, so it's very delicate. Treat it accordingly.

4) Not stroking her body

A woman's biggest sex organ is her mind. The next biggest is her skin. If you were thinking of anything else, think again. For a woman, sex is all about connection. And that includes skin to skin contact. An hour spent massaging her will arouse her to her need for sex and almost certainly guarantee she has an orgasm one way or another. So ensure you focus on putting some sexual energy into your fingers while you massage her. That means not thinking distractedly about the football game while you're oiling her up.

5) Locking onto her nipples like a suckling child

Tempting though it may be to lavish your oral attention on her breasts, she's not going to thank you for reminding her of the last time a teething child bit into her nipple. Kiss all around her breasts and gently work towards her nipple, gently licking it with your tongue and maybe carefully sucking it between your lips when she's really aroused. If she likes what you're doing, you'll know by her moans of delight.

6) Biting or blowing on her earlobe because you think it's sexy

Very few women seem to find this exciting. Your time would be better spent searching out her sensitive zones elsewhere.

7) Leaving a kiss bite on her neck

If you're over the age of consent, this is a no-no. If you need to know why, you're obviously under age and you shouldn't be having sex.

8) Not shaving before sex

Think what it was like the last time you gave oral sex to a woman with a few days' stubble around her vulva. Now imagine that brushing back and forth on your face in the erotic throes of passionate kissing. Enough said?

9) Not washing your pits and bits before you have sex

Even if you just have what the French call a tart's wash, make sure you're a smell-free zone when you enter the bedroom. (In case you need to know - the male equivalent is washing your penis, balls, ass, and armpits.)

10) Forgetting that romance starts a long time before lovemaking

No woman wants to be taken for granted. If you touch her lovingly all day, keep shooting her sexy, loving looks, and take the trouble to make sure she knows you're thinking of her, she'll be ready to melt into your arms in the evening. Leaving loving little noteswhere she'll find them is also a good idea. But make sure they are romantic!

11) Penetrating her before she's ready

Yes, we know you want to get into her. But hold on. Take your time, let events move at their own pace, and only gently put that finger up her vagina when she's ready. While men forget that women like to be entered just as much as men (which is just as well, when you think how much men like to stick things up a woman), she'll only want this when she's aroused enough to enjoy it. So as you finger her clit, you can check out her vagina. If it's moist and open, she may well be receptive to a finger on her G-spot. Start gently and apply a firmer touch as you go. If you don't know what the G-spot is, go check it out on the internet.

12) Going for her clitoris during oral sex or masturbation

Most women just find this irritating - and very uncomfortable too, if the clit isn't aroused and slippery. Work from around her labia, the lips around her vulva, towards the clitoris as she gets more sexuall excited. Even then, a subtle touch along the shaft of her clitoris around to the side of the clitoral head may be better for her.

3) Stopping when she wants you to keep going till she comes

If she's nearing orgasm she certainly won't want you to stop whatever you're doing, whether it's with your cock, your fingers or your tongue. Bearing in mind how hard on the tongue cunnilingus can be, we suggest you make sure your hands are ready to take over if you get a bad case of lock jaw. If she's not saying much, she may be lying there silent because she's got lost in her sexual arousal, not because you're licking ineffectively at her clit. But then again, how would you know? She may be so excited by what you're doing that she shows it by pressing her vulva more firmly against your mouth or fingers, in which case carry on with your stimulation. If she gives off an aura that she'd rather be cooking the dinner, you need to think of something else. Like asking her what she wants, maybe?

14) Undressing her inelegantly

Listen up guys: you don't have to take her bra off with one hand blindfold in the dark while you kiss her. Indeed, she might well appreciate it more if you don't even try. Nothing about an underwear fumble is funny, when it interrupts the romance. Let her take off anything you don't know about and when you do help, make it look like you're undressing her gently and sensuously rather than pulling at her clothes like you can't wait to fuck her - even if you that's true.

15) Looking like a clown in the bedroom

Nothing is more pathetic to a woman than a man wearing his underpants and socks. Why this should be so remains a mystery, since it seems so natural to a man to undress like that. However, if you don't want her to laugh, take off your socks first.

16) Expecting her to shave for you

Yes, we know you like the smooth look around her vulva, but if she's not into shaving, don't try and make her do it for you. There are few things more annoying than itchy stubble in the groin. If you want to see more and have easier access to her pussy, ask her to trim the hair.

17) Entering her without asking her first

Such a bizarre idea! And yet so nice - occasionally, at least - to be romantic and ask "May I enter you?" This can be a very sexy and loving thing to do if you're looking deep into her eyes. Needless to say, you'll be in the the man on top position, which, by the way, remains everyone's most popular position for sex. And then again, sometimes you can just sense the moment for penetration - but don't let your judgment be affected by your desire to fuck here. Yes, we know it feels very nice. But be a man - and make sure she's ready first.

18) Pecking away around her vagina with your penis if you can't get in

There is nothing more guaranteed to turn a woman off than you thrusting blindly at her vulva trying to get your penis in her vagina. If you can't find the way in (it happens) on your own, tell her what's going on and ask her to guide your penis in. There's no shame in that, but acting like a clown can ruin sex for you both. And anyway, it'll be quicker if she just puts it in for you.

19) Pumping away without regard for her pleasure

Now you're in! Hurrah! But whatcha gonna do next? Pump away heartily till you ejaculate? Bad idea.....surely you'll want to show a certain consideration for her pleasure? Start with slow and shallow thrusts. When you make love, she'll like it best if you act masculine and strong: be confident, know what you're doing, be thoughtful and gentle at first, and work up to harder and more vigorous thrusts if she makes it clear that's what she wants (as in "oh, yes, fuck me harder!").

20) Expecting her to willingly offer her bottom to you when you want rear entry sex

It's a man thing, the desire for rear entry sex. Mostly. Then again, women sometimes get the urge for rampant, primal sex too. In between, you might get it on special occasions, if you're lucky. And if you do persuade her to indulge you, don't make the mistake of slapping her rump like you're spurring her on to buck harder and faster.

21) Getting carried away when you have a big penis

If you happen to have a large member, restrain yourself as you thrust, or you might hear her shriek as you bang into her cervix. This will not, in all likelihood, be a shriek of delight. It may, however, signal the end of your pleasure for now.

22) Premature ejaculation is not the mark of a mature lover

Very few men have the staying power that allows them to really please a woman who enjoys vaginal intercourse and G-spot stimulation. You can improve your staying-power with self help exercises, but if you just can't be bothered, at least have the consideration to keep going for long enough to give her some satisfaction. Do some research on Google for "end premature ejaculation".

23) Not coming at all - retarded ejaculation

Delayed ejaculation is not the gift of the gods that you might think. She won't see it as any kind of blessing, either, when her cunt is bone dry, she's bored out of her mind and you still aren't anywhere near ejaculating. So if you are one of the ten percent of men who have trouble reaching orgasm, go see a sexual therapist! The sooner you get treated, the sooner she'll be able to enjoy making love with you and stop having plenty of time to think about the exact shade of paint to put on the bedroom ceiling.

24) Losing your erection when you put the condom on

This is very common, so it's back to Google for you. Try a search on "losing erection when putting on a condom" and see if you can find a solutions.

25) Not going down on her when she wants cunnilingus

I haven't yet met a man who didn't like the idea of going down on a woman, so any reservations must be about her scent or taste. If she's a bit well, fishy, then suggest a bath as part of foreplay. If all you're interested in is getting her to suck your cock and you won't reciprocate, reading these tips isn't going to help you.

26) Failing to ensure her pleasure if you come quickly

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